The "P" in Pivot

Samantha Bauer(00:01.129)
Welcome back everyone to Sisters in Law of Attraction podcast. I'm Sam.

Christine Goforth(00:06.101)
And I'm Christine.

Samantha Bauer(00:08.226)
Thanks for joining us again. Here we are again, Christine. I mean, this is just, we just are just having so much fun. And honestly, every time we talk about, okay, so what are we gonna talk about next time? It is so organic and so easy. It just sort of just comes together, just very natural. And it's just fun stuff to talk about.

Christine Goforth(00:12.066)
Here we are.

Christine Goforth(00:22.68)
Mm-hmm.

Christine Goforth(00:32.364)
Well, and I think it's it speaks to the broader, I think, population of where it's like we all have these little organic moments in life and where you can catch up with people. And that's what it feels like we're doing is getting together, catching up on things that have impacted us, quotes that we've read, how we can apply them to life. And you're right, it comes together so organically. And I know that we are not.

Christine Goforth(00:32.364)
the only people. Like, I think that this is exactly what everybody needs.

Samantha Bauer(01:04.641)
Agreed. Yeah. Well, and we're starting to hear it too, right? We're starting to get some feedback from our listeners. And I think for me, what's kind of fun is that we naturally thought like, okay, our audience is just going to be women, right? Because I mean, because we're women, but isn't it funny that our last two guests were men. And a listener reached out to me and said,

Christine Goforth(01:25.026)
We're men.

Christine Goforth(01:29.102)
you

Samantha Bauer(01:34.323)
Sam, I sent this to my husband. You know, he needs to, he needs to listen to this. And we've actually heard from, from male listeners too. And I think, we kind of played small quite frankly, in the beginning, perhaps thinking like, gee, golly gosh, you know, maybe it's just going to be like moms. Yeah.

Christine Goforth(01:37.846)
Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Christine Goforth(01:47.766)
Right?

Christine Goforth(01:51.823)
It's just women, 25 to 55, right?

Samantha Bauer(01:57.131)
Right, exactly. clearly, the feedback to us is that we all are in different places of our lives, but the things that we're talking about on Sisters-in-Law of Attraction are tools and practices that everyone can use to improve, just actually not improve their life, just live the life you're meant to live.

Christine Goforth(02:24.3)
Right, right.

Samantha Bauer(02:24.817)
And that is in the lane of joy and gratitude and anyhow, so we, again, we geek out on this stuff and it's just so fun to talk about. Several episodes ago, we introduced this idea of the pivot method. And we talked about Christine, the importance of resilience, being able to pivot, life is constantly changing, constantly serving up challenges.

Samantha Bauer(02:24.817)
you know, and I always say how you respond in this moment matters, right? What is, what's that pivot look like? And when we presented the idea, you know, was, is the backdrop really was, you know, based on, you know, our own life experiences right now, you know, me launching, you know, my, my two birdies, you, you know, in the, in the throws of, two teenage girls, approaching that empty nest and, and

Christine Goforth(03:05.88)
Right.

Christine Goforth(03:12.79)
Yep.

Christine Goforth(03:17.576)
yeah. And boy, do I need to get a handle on that before it happens.

Samantha Bauer(03:22.265)
Well, and we did, right? Last time we talked about, wouldn't it be great to start talking about what that pivot looks like for parents? I mean, this is the most important job we'll ever do is raise children. And I was actually talking to a woman a couple of days ago, I don't know, I guess her kids are 10 and 12. And she was asking about me and I was telling her about my adult kids and she just like, I can't even think of it. I can't even think.

Samantha Bauer(03:22.265)
I can't even think about my, own children potentially leaving me. And so I, I, you know, didn't completely, you know, react and, and, and judge, but I said, perhaps you can think of it in a totally different way. Right. Hey, know something that you could, you might be able to use. So anyhow.

Christine Goforth(03:51.854)
Mm.

Christine Goforth(04:01.674)
Right.

Christine Goforth(04:05.848)
Perhaps there's a podcast you could listen to.

Samantha Bauer(04:15.641)
The pivot method, I'm just gonna go just quickly through the letters on what we have created as far as how you can approach big changes in your life, big transitions. And so the P stands for purpose. Really and truly, what's my purpose in life? Why am I here? That's the big question.

Christine Goforth(04:41.464)
Well, and I think that it changes. I don't think that we are born and we have one purpose. I think you have different purposes for different seasons of life.

Samantha Bauer(04:44.951)
Yes.

Samantha Bauer(04:44.951)
right.

Samantha Bauer(04:51.627)
Absolutely, I totally agree with that. And then the I stands for innovate, right? This is your opportunity, this is your life. You get to write, you get to write this story. No one gets to write it.

Christine Goforth(05:02.326)
It's that realization. That's that realization that's so hard, I think, to step back out of your life that you live day to day today. And for most of us, it's pretty the same. It's pretty regimented. And realizing like, wait, it doesn't have to be this way. Like, wait, right. My husband works remote and I'm a substitute teacher. We don't have to live here. We could just leave.

Samantha Bauer(05:21.601)
I can totally write a different story.

Samantha Bauer(05:29.111)
Right. Right. That's a weird, right? Right. Again, right. Innovate. Create the life. Right. I always say, you know, live a good story. Right. I mean, you can write the story, but also live a good story. And this is your opportunity to be creative and to innovate. The V stands for value. Right. Value yourself. Love yourself. This work.

Christine Goforth(05:30.54)
Like that's a weird thought to have when you've never had it. Yeah.

Christine Goforth(05:43.533)
Right.

Christine Goforth(05:55.522)
You, uh-huh, you deserve, you deserve it. You deserve all of the things. You deserve to dream big and live big. We all do.

Samantha Bauer(05:58.296)
Right?

Samantha Bauer(06:04.663)
Right, right. And so it's easy to put everything and everyone else ahead of you, but taking care of you, right? Living in the lane of joy and gratitude, opening yourself up to all the great things that the universe, God, whatever wants to serve up for you, you're actually gonna make a bigger impact on those around you, your family, your friends, your community, if you just simply show up, you know.

Christine Goforth(06:30.284)
Yep.

Samantha Bauer(06:33.525)
as your best self, know, I mean, but it takes valuing yourself enough to spend time in this space, right?

Christine Goforth(06:42.997)
Right, right. Well, and to that point when you are taking care of yourself and you are showing up with joy, whether we like it or not, I think a lot of us take on other people's emotions sometimes, other people. It can be a very, why is the word slipping from my head? Contagious. It can be very contagious, right?

Samantha Bauer(06:59.053)
Yes.

Samantha Bauer(07:06.937)
Yes. Yes.

Christine Goforth(07:09.837)
A bad mood can be contagious and a good mood can be contagious. And going to the phrase that people will remember how you've made them feel, I think about that all the time. Like I want people to remember that I've made them feel good. I've uplifted them. I've made their day a little bit better, whatever that looks like. And so if you're taking care of yourself in that way and you are showing up for yourself and

Samantha Bauer(07:14.081)
Absolutely.

Samantha Bauer(07:30.453)
Exactly. Right. Right.

Christine Goforth(07:38.551)
thinking about your purpose and your passions and what you wanna do, you're happier, you go out into the world a happier person. And if everybody did that, we would have a much happier world, I think.

Samantha Bauer(07:47.809)
Exactly.

Samantha Bauer(07:52.877)
I agree. And also Christine, think it's, we, we feel like we have to make other people happy. And once we unshackle ourselves from that, our job, our responsibility is not to make other people happy, right? We can be in service of others. We can certainly help people, but we cannot control their happiness. I am not in control of your happiness. And I got to tell you, you know, growing up, I was, I was a pleaser.

Christine Goforth(08:08.993)
Right. Sure. Always.

Samantha Bauer(08:22.081)
right, very codependent tendencies. I had to, I felt like I had to make sure everyone else was okay. And once I finally realized and I gave up control of that, wait a minute, all I have to do is show up with happiness and joy in my heart. That's it. Because, know,

Christine Goforth(08:45.121)
Yep.

Samantha Bauer(08:47.053)
That's that person's choice. If they choose unhappiness or to be miserable, that's okay. But to bang your head against the wall and trying to make other people happy when some people's, I mean, let's just space it, some people's cup is never filled.

Christine Goforth(08:53.995)
Yeah.

Christine Goforth(09:00.555)
Right.

Christine Goforth(09:08.097)
Right, right. It's a thriving on living in that space of doom and gloom. mm-hmm, yeah.

Samantha Bauer(09:15.883)
of lack, right? Of lack of happiness. it's like, or, and you and I used to do this too, right? I mean, we talked about this early on. It's, you know, I'm just, right? I'm just gonna, I'm gonna be not totally happy. I'm not gonna be euphoric because something bad's gonna happen. So I have to kind of.

Christine Goforth(09:22.317)
Mm. Mm-hmm.

Christine Goforth(09:33.365)
and then it's gonna be even more disappointing. Yes.

Samantha Bauer(09:36.513)
Right, right, so I'm just gonna kinda hang out in the middle and I'm just gonna chill and I'm just gonna, I'm not gonna, there's not gonna be big highs, there's not gonna be big lows, I'm just gonna chill right here because I wanna be safe. But it actually is okay to live a truly happy and joyous life and it's within your reach, right? So that's V, value yourself, love yourself. O stands for opportunity. You gotta seek out opportunity.

Christine Goforth(09:39.661)
Mm-hmm.

Christine Goforth(09:54.999)
Right.

Christine Goforth(10:05.247)
And say yes. Yeah.

Samantha Bauer(10:05.305)
You can't just sit back and wait for the world to deliver it. You got to seek out opportunity to discover.

Christine Goforth(10:16.917)
which leads us to that 20 seconds of courage that we talked about in our last podcast. 20 seconds of courage, find the opportunity. Yep.

Samantha Bauer(10:20.001)
Yes. Exactly. Because new opportunity, yeah, new opportunity requires 20 seconds of courage to take action towards that, right? Cause it's, it's new. And so that's, that's the O and, and, and pivot. And then T finally is test, test yourself, test your limits, right? Again, it's that whole un...

Christine Goforth(10:30.805)
Yeah. Mm-hmm.

Christine Goforth(10:43.325)
Mm-hmm. You can't grow if you don't try.

Samantha Bauer(10:46.753)
Right. It's that whole being uncomfortable piece. so anyhow, you know, we haven't found all the answers to life, but I feel like this model, this method that we've put together and pivot, again, we wrapped it around, you know, the major transition that's going on in our lives and that's, know, with our own children. But this can apply to any major transition in your life.

Christine Goforth(11:12.407)
Career change, moving, truly anything. Anything. Uh-huh. yeah.

Samantha Bauer(11:15.827)
Exactly. Aging parents, right? I mean, just all the things of life. And I appreciated, Christine, what you said with purpose, finding your purpose. It's not static, right? It's not just like, gosh, I got to find my one thing that I'm supposed to do in this life. It's very dynamic based on the season of your life, right?

Christine Goforth(11:31.66)
Mm-mm.

Christine Goforth(11:42.349)
I'll slip in a little story about my youngest who just turned 13, but this was probably maybe even two years ago. Very deep thinker she is and came to me and was like, she was having a really hard time with what her purpose is. And I said, honey bunch, you're at the time 11, like 10 and a half, your purpose right now.

Samantha Bauer(12:08.59)
Yeah.

Christine Goforth(12:11.634)
is to go to school, do your very best, be kind, stand up for people, be a leader, be respectful, go help in your community. Like this is your purpose right now. This will not always be your purpose. And when you find your next purpose, you'll realize like, okay, that was in that season of life, like you said, and now I'm...

Christine Goforth(12:11.634)
18 and now my purpose is to go live a fun, happy college life and learn and experience new things and adventure and learn, grow, take opportunities, right? And your purpose in your thirties might be to raise kids or whatever you want your purpose. Like it's, it's okay to not have it all figured out right now. It's going to change always.

Samantha Bauer(12:44.835)
Sure. Right. And learn. Yeah. Learn. Learn.

Samantha Bauer(12:56.781)
Right. Right.

Samantha Bauer(13:03.095)
Right. And I think, you know, I read an article recently in Psychology Today and the author was talking about exactly your point. It's not a light bulb moment. It's not like you chase this one answer your entire life to discover why the hell am I here? Like it doesn't have to be that dramatic. the author actually said that it can develop slowly over time.

Christine Goforth(13:14.272)
Right.

Samantha Bauer(13:28.433)
And you know you but you have to you have to lean in a little bit, right? You got to be in the white space be reflective and it's very much an inward thing You're not going to find that answer Externally that you know, the world's not gonna tell you your friends not gonna tell you your your mom's not gonna tell you you Just and again, it comes back to the V in pivot value yourself spend time in that white space spend time reflecting and

Christine Goforth(13:37.345)
Yeah.

Christine Goforth(13:40.905)
Nope.

Samantha Bauer(13:57.977)
It actually comes back to go ahead. I, yep. Yep.

Christine Goforth(14:00.888)
the strengths and the weaknesses and, and things that when, when a thought crosses your head, does it drag you down or does it excite you? If either way dig a little deeper. If, if the thought of going to work tomorrow is like the worst thing ever beyond just, it's work and it's not the weekend, right? Okay. Dig a little deeper. What do you actually want to be doing?

Samantha Bauer(14:14.432)
Exactly.

Samantha Bauer(14:25.304)
Right, right.

Samantha Bauer(14:25.304)
Yeah. Right. Exactly.

Christine Goforth(14:31.1)
And whether it's feasible to, obviously for most people not feasible to quit your job and just, you know, take six months to go find out what you want to do, but 20 seconds of action to sit with it and think, okay, what are some steps I could take while I'm hating my job or whatever it is that I can be doing where it's like, for me, if I have something that I'm worried about or like just doing something.

Samantha Bauer(14:40.138)
Right. Yes.

Samantha Bauer(14:51.415)
Right.

Christine Goforth(15:00.854)
helps. And so if you can take that time to look inward and think, okay, let's dig a little deeper. What is my, why am I feeling these feelings? What would excite me? And then, you know, start those building blocks.

Samantha Bauer(15:01.389)
Right, exactly.

Samantha Bauer(15:12.352)
Exactly.

Samantha Bauer(15:12.352)
Right, and the author talks about what are some of the things that you do that you completely lose time. When you're doing an activity and you're not aware of the clock and you lose yourself in it. And it reminded me of when I was writing Rebound and I remember dropping off the kids at school, coming back to my home office and literally sitting there and looking back at the clock from about 8.30.

Christine Goforth(15:22.368)
Yes. Yep.

Samantha Bauer(15:43.651)
to like, my God, I'm almost late at 3 p.m. picking them up. It was an incredible experience. So that's what told me that, you know, I'm passionate about writing, right? I mean, that's right.

Christine Goforth(15:46.508)
Holy moly, yep.

Christine Goforth(15:55.84)
That was your, that was a passion at the time. And whether you're passionate, like you were then now, maybe your passion right now is a little bit different, but it's like you took the 20 seconds of bravery. You took that opportunity to write the book, to do the thing, and you lost yourself in it. Not in a bad way, but every day it's like, my God, what time is it? I got to go. Like I, I'm losing hours. Yeah.

Samantha Bauer(16:01.729)
Exactly.

Samantha Bauer(16:14.007)
Yep. Right. Right. Right. Exactly. Right. No, it's, and you know, I this a little bit of an aside. I keep on going back to Scott Galloway just cause I'm listening to his algebra of happiness right now. What I actually kind of love and he's, he's kind of a, he, he, he's kind of a self-proclaimed asshole, right? I mean, he's just kind of edgy.

Christine Goforth(16:38.296)
okay.

Samantha Bauer(16:39.813)
and he's gonna tell it like it is, but he has these really great conversations with his business students. I mean, these are all kids that are brilliant and getting their MBAs and that sort of thing, but also asking the question, what's my purpose? What am I supposed to be doing? Is it really just getting the biggest paycheck and the biggest salary? That's okay too.

Christine Goforth(16:55.35)
Hmm. Yeah.

Christine Goforth(17:02.326)
Sure. Great.

Samantha Bauer(17:04.205)
going after that you're a great paycheck or being an entrepreneur, making your own money, that's all good things. But what I appreciated with him saying, he said, you know, only truly rich people will tell you go after your passion. He goes, that's bullshit. He said, don't follow your passion, do something you're good at and get great at it, right? And so all the other things will fall.

Christine Goforth(17:19.733)
Yeah.

Christine Goforth(17:19.733)
That's so true.

Christine Goforth(17:30.732)
There you go.

Christine Goforth(17:30.732)
Yeah.

Samantha Bauer(17:33.933)
all the other things that make you passionate. So again, find a craft, something that you're good at and get great at it. But this whole bullshit of following your passion and all of that. And I thought, you know what? I kind of love that.

Christine Goforth(17:44.502)
Yeah.

Christine Goforth(17:51.922)
You know what too though, Sam is okay, if you think about it too, right? Like I'll take my husband for an example. He went to school for music before he went to school for music. He was in a band, he played guitar, all the things he wanted to, he just immersed himself in music. By the time he graduated college, he works with technology now. And it's when it's almost as if, and I know now I feel like I'm contradicting what I said earlier, but it's like,

Samantha Bauer(18:13.101)
Right.

Samantha Bauer(18:20.897)
Haha

Christine Goforth(18:21.405)
If you are, if your hobby or the thing you're passionate about and love doing then becomes a career, it doesn't, I think the passion is different. The passion is not passion anymore. Now it's you're working for a paycheck. So, so perhaps it's, it's do what you're good at and get great at it. And also have balance in your life to do the things that

Samantha Bauer(18:29.933)
Yeah.

Samantha Bauer(18:34.114)
Agreed.

Samantha Bauer(18:38.612)
Exactly. Yeah.

Samantha Bauer(18:48.185)
So you can pursue your passions. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. And so anyhow, that's a little, no, so true. So true. Exactly. Right. And it's like how you make your money, you know, it does not have to be your life's purpose. It does not, you know, that's not the be all end all to your point, right? You can coexist and actually you can pursue the things that you're curious about.

Christine Goforth(18:50.483)
Yes, exactly.

Christine Goforth(18:50.483)
Cause it doesn't have to be either or. Sorry to interrupt. It doesn't have to be either or. You can do it all.

Christine Goforth(19:18.091)
Mm-hmm.

Samantha Bauer(19:18.221)
that excite you, that bring that passion in your life completely and separate from how you make your living and build your wealth and pay your bills and all of that.

Christine Goforth(19:28.511)
and how when the two collide, right? I mean, I think so many hobbies or passions, there could be a world in which you bring that into your workplace. Maybe the two collide, some kind of creative, whatever it is. I don't know, just, the opportunities really are limitless. We just have to believe it.

Samantha Bauer(19:43.254)
Exactly.

Samantha Bauer(19:51.373)
Right, exactly, exactly. And then in this article in Psychology Today, I'm actually gonna call out the author, it's Megan Dalla-Camina, and she's the founder and CEO of Women Rising. And when she really kind of dug into this, you know, finding your purpose stuff, and you know, she says, it's not something, your purpose is, you don't stumble on it, you build over time. And also, we would add, Christine, to your point, you know, your purpose shifts,

Christine Goforth(20:14.229)
Right.

Samantha Bauer(20:21.047)
depending on the season of life that you're in. But I think it's important. It's important to have a purpose because it's sort of like the beacon of your life. You gotta have that thing, that lighthouse that you're headed toward. It just kind of, it beckons you, it helps drive all the decisions in your life.

Christine Goforth(20:24.512)
right?

Christine Goforth(20:38.847)
Yeah? Mm-hmm.

Samantha Bauer(20:47.031)
I mean, because I mean, we've all done it fumbly and bumbly through life. Right.

Christine Goforth(20:51.087)
Mm-hmm every nearly every day I think at some point right I mean

Samantha Bauer(20:54.841)
Hahaha!

Samantha Bauer(20:54.841)
But you know, if you're intentional, right? If you're intentional with your life and you're clear with that purpose, right? And again, it goes back to the pie that we talked about, right? Being high vibe-y and then having clarity about what you want and having clear purpose, right? You have at least a path and something you're working towards. And here we are again. It's just, know, it's the end. It's the end. We have so much to talk about.

Christine Goforth(21:01.099)
Yeah.

Christine Goforth(21:07.369)
Yeah.

Christine Goforth(21:11.721)
Yes!

Christine Goforth(21:11.721)
Mm-hmm.

Christine Goforth(21:21.909)
Here we are again.

Christine Goforth(21:26.827)
I literally had a thought and now it's escaping me. So it's probably fine that it's time, but it was, yeah, definitely.

Samantha Bauer(21:32.065)
Well, you you'll have to save it for next time because I, yeah, certainly next time we're going to dive into this whole I this, know, innovate your life, write your own story. but, again, we just, we just love this stuff. I mean, this is just, this is the, what a blessing, right? Christine to have this opportunity. Yeah. Yeah.

Christine Goforth(21:42.11)
Yep.

Christine Goforth(21:48.713)
This is the best. It really is. This is definitely my purpose right now. For sure. I've never been more clear about that.

Samantha Bauer(21:55.033)
Absolutely. 100 % agreed. Well, thank you all for joining us. We're so excited to welcome you back next time. This is Sisters-in-Law of Attraction Podcast. I'm Sam. And we'll see you next time.

Christine Goforth(22:08.725)
And I'm Christine.